I see many clients with relationship issues. Sometimes I see clients individually who just work on themselves to get a greater sense of self knowledge and self esteem to be able to build a better relationship with their partner and to relate better. I work with the individual in this area by exploring the emotional responses to interactions that are going on with the partner then to look back as to what past relationships and past dramas may be contributing to how they are feeling now. We then look into rebuilding a sense of self esteem and to be able to interact in an adult to adult assertive manner. The goal is to work to build interdependent relationships based on maturity and mutual respect.
I work with clients in this area individually most of the time first and then together or sometimes just together from the start. If the goal of a client is to have couples Counselling eventually it is always useful to atleast have one individual session with the partner alone first to allow a balance to happen so neither client feels favoured.
We work with the ideas that a codependent relationship is an A shape type of relationhip whereas there are issues on either side whereas neither person has a strong sense of themselves so they rely on the partner to fill certain needs. This commonly raises itself in couples counselling. We therefore work with trying to allow each partner to obtain a constructive healthy sense of themselves and to allow a building of a more H type of relationship whereas each is allowed is allowed to feel healthy and free alone while enjoying and appreciating a connection to the partner.